kinda tired today... had dinner with papa, dad, mom n bro at new park hotel after work... got a tonnes of birthday wishes from my frens n cousins.. hahah~

but erm.. kinda disappointed in my frens... those whom i considered on average terms like wee liang and ben, at least they bother to send me a bdae wish...

those that i considered on good terms, i bet they just forgot... yiling... even my cousin kurt n god-bro derrick n li han also forgotten... but anyway, yiling is currently clubbing with her frens n bf, so i doubt she would even remember...

kurt lei.. donno lar.. forget it...

derrick lei... too busy for o's lar... cant blame also oh...

li han lei.. in his heart only got katie this sis lar... the other sis [me] i think he's already forgotten about my life n death. anyway, i dont think he would even bother to read my blog...

he also tyco lor... got problems to solve then come find me... nothing then heck care. anyway, this kind person i also dont want to talk to him. waste my time only.

it's not that i'm mad at him for not remembering my bdae. he's just too much. way too much. i just dislike anyone who just take me for granted. enoug is enough. really dont want to talk to him anymore. had enough of him already. got problems then talk to me nicely, ask me how this how that.. then tell u solutions.. cannot this cannot that.. then what do u want me to do?? u think i'm god is it.. know the right solutions for everything?? i've got enough troubles on my hands and u want me to solve yours?? forget it. go find your baby bear katie lar, pls. she's also your mei. somemore u like her what. talk to her more lar... always ask me how how.... enough of your bullshit already lar.

crap

treat people nice when they dont even care abt your life and death... what's the use??

i've finally found some enlightment.

it's of no use to treat people kind when they just dont give a damn abt u.

you're being kind to others when being kind to yourself.

anyway, i really dont care who's seeing this. yes, this is what i'm feeling right now. but, no use getting mad over this kind of person.

i'd rather have a enjoyable bdae. in fact, i did... haha~

tmr will be goin' over to kenny' house @ simei.. meeting up with kenny, math, wei yi, sunkist n wisely for dinner... then go changi beach..

mathz rmb the bino!! LOL!!!

havent been posting for nearly a week already... i went to cut my hair again.. hahah!! the last time was last month?? but that time only trim lar.. this time go is cut a bit.. trim here n there.. tada!! LOL!!! cuz these few days also hot as hell oh...

anyway, today during work.. we couldn't find the conference room key!!! called jennifer lar then she is SO damn confirmed that she returned to me.. in the end leh, have to get Bala to open toe room from inside.. which means he have to climb throught the fake ceiling lar.. and what's right in the middle of the table is the key. -.-"" kaOz~ why they dont ever return the key anyway.. make the our lives so difficult like hell...

whatever lar.. tmr will be leaving the office @ 8 instead oh.. hahah~

ok.. i've got 2 blogs now... one in here, another at moblog.. i've promise sara to post at both together.. siGh~ but i still like blogspot better lar.. at least people don need to sign up then can leave comments ma... then at moblog, i can know who left a comment and who dropped by also.. haha~ both also got their pros n cons lar...

anyway, erz.. ankle's not well yet.. no big deal lar.. old injury... the cause of it was at teckwah.. forgot who anyhow play with the trolley then got langa with me.. then tio ankle. took few wks then recover... now, it starts to hurt again.. siAn 1/2

but heck care already... my ankles... donno what to say abt them also... injured till.. donno how many million times already... quite inconvenient also lar.. but who cares?? i don really care.. LOL!!

oh.. l also change my job liao.. LOL!! luckily i ran fast oh.. LOL!! yesterday they kicked out quite alot of people.. i quit becuz... even though everyday work 7am to 7pm, that kok swee always ask us to work OT till 9 or 10pm... then reach home very late already, next day still have to wake up bloody hell @ 5am for the transport. quit lar... i went for interview at another company today... also at tuas lar, but is office work de.. work 5 days a wk, 8am to 5.30pm.

though pay without OT is lesser lar.. but nvm... enough to pay my hp bill can liao... LOL!!!

my foot haven heal yet.. siAN!!!

obviously someone has already forgotten who i am already... but he won't even bother to come and read de lar.. so nvm de... no choice lar.. he got another mei liao... then one he like de... more important mah... then his not-so-important mei nvm de liao lor... her bdae coming ler... 19th of apr... he gave her a lucky charm frm japan and his belt... hope that kor will be with her soon...

anyway, i doubt that he will remember my bdae lar.... suan le ba.. that's life...

just feel sad now.. cryin'.... dont say i bo liao.. i just want to cry cuz too long never cry liao.. havin' too much of things within me.. very xing ku u know...

but i dont think anyone will know lar...
i know too much things ler....
life is ending....
for me.

yesterday went to ite simei to pay sch fees.. 148 bucks... for a semester lar. haha~ then went down to bugis.. met up with mom... went sakae sushi for dinner.... hEe~ then went to raffles city... actually want to help robert to searh te hp pouch for shan cai... but then lei.. can't find the shop he was talking abt.. then forget it... went to royal sports n spent $61.70.. hahah~ on nike products, duHz!!a fter that, went to adelphi to look for paps..

then today.. went to mechmaster at bukit timah plaza.. played pool with lim jia, yao hong, jun long, yi nian and one more forgot his name guy.. lOL!! 1st timer... so only manage to win lim jia cuz he's got his cue ball in together with the black one... lOL!!

guess that's all lar.. haha! bb!!

truthfully... it's not always a wise choice to treat people nice... some people really don't deserve all this kindness.. they dont even appreciate it... they even dare to take it for granted. hy should there be this kind of people living in this world... just a shit from the hell... anyway, i'm sick and tired of people treating me like this. anyway, i've already said what i want. if one day i should leave them out of my life, i guess it's a more wonderful idea than remembering them. just because they're so heartless to their dear friends who certainly don't deserve all this shit. anyway, if one day i should leave, i guess their lives will be better...
total shutdown of brain...
a subconcious girl was here ranking about the unfairness of her life.

"i got a good buddy last time
he loves a gal very very much
he is kind of like commando macho guy
never enter kitchen or cook anything by himself
one day .. his gal dumped him ..
that is a week before her bday
aiya .. found another better man lor
also partly the guy got fault lah
he not caring enough
he thinks he is a man .. the girl should do housework , should do cooking etc
then after breakup he very sad, lately realize he loves the gal just too much
he went to register for a cooking class
on her birthday ....
he baked a cake for her
when i heard about it i broke into serious laughs ;D
he is kind of man who never can even cook instant noodles
but for her ... he baked a cake
unfortunately the gal gave him no chance ....
he called her repeatedly trying to date her out on her bday
but failed
so ....
he only can left the self-baked cake at her doorstep, with a little note ...
that says 'dearest of my life , ... i have learnt i missed out a lot of things in my life ... i never know can bake a cake .. but for you, i did, finally'
year after year ... every year he did the same
just baked a cake and left it at her doorstep ...
he wondered ... how come that girl never contacted him
but he not gave up ...
until one day ... he found out from her mum ...
the girl actually passed away due to heart disease
but before she died .. she was actually waiting for the guy to chase her back
but that stupid man didnt
just baked cake on her bday !!!!"

*this story was told to me by Kenny
direct copy n paste from msn conversation*

morale of story: when you love someone, there is no shame to tell him/her direct. not just bake cake on her bday !!

urh hum... was supposed to work today.. but, but... i woke up late.. very late.. hahah~ gotta woke up at 5am lar.. but woke at 8.30 instead.. lOl~!! in da end, go temple with papa for qing ming lor... hahha~ paps searched high n low for their remaining bones.. stuff like that lar... but couldn't find lor... i found them later... hahah~

anyway lor... i haven't got my pay yet... christine said monday then will get lor... doTx... only mine ler... cuz she dont have my acc no. -.-

jies bdae coming soon le...19th n 24th... donno what to get for them... shir-jie.. HeLp!!

bro's bdae also soon lor... still got another 1 month 5 days... hMmz.. also have no idea what to get for him... maybe games??? donno leHx...

eHx.. suggestions??

woW~ what a day i had at work... we were erm... rushing pcb for shipment... i guess the usual gang [me, wei liang, yi long, you hao, zhao da] have to work till 9... yes, as usual... were supposed to knock off at 7pm everyday lar.. but everyday got OT till 9.. siAn 0.5 right?? anyway, today we kinda sneaked off.. hahah~ actually, we have to wait for the night shift staff to turn up b4 leaving... but scared that mommy [our sup, kok swee] asked us to stay till 9 again.. that's why we siam first.. lOl!!

anyway, today the fixtures at my station is a whole pile of shit... why?? at first, i've got around 6, then 4, then 3 then 2... shit right?? then kena jam like hell... bth... then slowly clear liao... for model A9... then last min.. somewhere around 5+ urgent shipment for A8... -.- actually early part of the day got deal with both A8 n A9... then everything changed to A8.. then really rush like there's no tmr... siGh!!

i didn't know what had happened... but it really looked like something HAS happened... but i did remembered somebody told me something about a friend of mine.. something sad, i guess... that's why i had tears rolling off my cheeks then... i had been weeping... in my dream.

well, that's something i dreamt of few days ago... erm.. i don't know... just a dream.. haha~ nth to write, that's why... actually there's something more, but can't remember already... oh, whatever... time to work!!

okay.. fine.. someone hung up on me yesterday night.. twice. forget it lar... 1st time called back, phone engaged lor.. 2nd time ar.. got through lar.. but then, became on hold... waited for a while.. don wan to continue then hang up the phone ler...

my bdae's coming.. well, still has quite a long way though.. hahha~ but i'm kinda wishing for a new phone for myself from myself.. yes.. i want to buy it for myself as bdae present.... heE!!

abt my medical examination.. i hope everything was fine lar... waiting for 13th apr... then will know the result... oh, man... dad doesn't allow me to go play pool on that day.. sam's allowed to go already... siAnz riGht?? -.- it's only going with 2 frens whom i know frm teckwah... kAoZ~ not fair lor.. other people can go but i cant.. darn it lar... now also hardly go out with frens already...
nvm lar.. cannot go cannot go lor.. forget it...

btw, i went to watch eye 10 last ermm.. sat... sstupidity larrr... last time everyday watch horror show not scared.. then 4 yrs never watch, now scared liao.. 1st show in this 4-5 yrs is white noise.. this is only my 2nd show.. scared lor.. shit right... lOl~ so pS in front of my fren... sHuCks~

anyway ler.. it a mixture of both funny and scary.. 10 ways to see ghosts.. if i could remember..
1. the famously oujia board
2. knocking on bowls @ the x-junction
3. playing hide n seek, releasing a black cat if cant find the last one
4. looking between your legs upside down
5. death: suicide
6. combing hair in front of mirror at 12am
7. wearing death's clothes that have been worn b4
8. rub your eyes with mud from newly grave
9. opening an umbrella in sheltered places

cant rmb the last one.. hahha~

i juz like my bg music... 秋日的私語... it's quite saddening lar, actually.. it's full of emotions... the soft of the piano frm the first part... then slowly, it has more beats n rhythms.. and more "strength" in the middle part of the music... something like.. agony, etc... then become sooth again...

to me, it just shows how our life is... the calm n sooth relaving moments... and the ups n downs, heartbreaking agony... it's just full of emotions... hahah~

i wonder if i'm the only one that can feel it..

figured out that i hadn't been blogging for quite a while... have a new job, that's why.. working 12 hours per day.. at tuas. fortunately, trasport was provided to and fro for the employees... haha~

kinda tired today.. so didn't go for work.. didn't attend uncle's wedding either.. well, he remarried, so there's only buffet at his house... but since the bride is frm malaysia, there'll be a dinner held there... heard from my dad that most of them are looking for me... haha~ almost everyone will start asking my dad why i wasn't there when he's there alone... but anyway, dad helped me out by sayin' i was at work.. :P they asked dad how's my result oh.. dad just told them i'm going to ite... but they said it's alright lar.. still can go poly.. oh, whatever... i just want to study nursing, no matter where.. haha~ that's my point...

daddy alvin, i miss u oh.. hahah~!!! crap, man... anyway, i'm waiting for my bdae present frm him.. :P we always have fun together.. lOl!! never miss out the neo-card machine, huh?? hahaah~