我依然單身。

離婚了幾年，我依然單身。不是因為條件，也不是因為對愛情死心。但卻依然單身。

自己知道，為甚麼不能好好談一場戀愛。就是因為自己太清楚自己是怎樣的一塊料，所以不會再輕而易舉把自己交出去。就像發現跌倒以後的傷口會留下疤痕，於是走路時不敢再大步跨出去。也知道認識一個人很簡單，但是要忘記一個人很困難。曾經幸福的閉上眼睛，讓另一個人帶你去任何地方，最後卻差點回不來。所以不能再失去方向感。

於是變得膽小，也在安慰自己，有朋友就足夠，現在的生活也過得非常好。雖然會有喜歡的對象，也想和他在一起。但是在這兒感覺之中有些慌張，害怕。所以希望把這份感覺埋著，不會特意的表達，讓他知道。

就算不害怕再次談一場戀愛，也不知道對方是否願意。哥哥說：“你不說，他怎麼知道”。

或許覺得戀愛並不重要，有也好，沒有也罷。也或許是因為曾經被傷得太深，害怕再跨出去。總總原因，就是不會對他說 “我喜歡你”。

Seriously?!?!?!?!

Theft in clinic, I can't believe it happened again! It happened before few months ago, and I was told it happened again! Seriously, the bosses are real nice people, one of the nicest I've met thus far, as a matter of fact. Although they weren't expensive medicine, the clinic a hundred or so over these 2 incidents. The total amount isn't that small, but even if it is, The clinic paid for the supplies regardless!

Yes, there are people who steal for a living or out of wits, but not this person! Heck, the person is stealing from the hands who is feeding her (in a way since we are paid for our work). It is absolutely wrong morally, ethically, criminally, whatsoever. Imagine if this happened to daddy, hell will take over. No kidding since he has a temper of fury at times.

And the best thing is, she's playing tai chi to the part-timers. My eyes gotten quite red when I was told, so boss thought that I felt wronged but I told her considering myself a bulletproof person since PRO takes blame for something that happened or not done usually. I feel unjust for the bosses simply because they don't deserve such happening at all!

She was told that if it happens again the police will be called in. I really hope that she stops what she's doing. I wonder where her morals and values are, really.

done, done, DONE!!!

I'm done with my assignments, finally!! Wohooooo~~~!!!!

Past weeks have been so bloody hectic with my girl falling sick, dad admitting to hospital, mid-term, 2 assignments due, and a whole LOTS of DLP + current rehab contracts work load. Even though i was born in April, April is a BLOODY HELL month for 2015. Regardless, I crashed through it, without dropping any subject!! Even though I'm guilty of having the thought for dropping 1 module in between, but i guess stress level does push ability to I came, I saw, I Conquered. HooYaaaahhhh!!!

I seriously forgot it was my birthday today until I received birthday greetings on my phone minutes earlier, and then it dawned on me that "oh yea, my birthday IS today." hahahahaha!! Big hooray that I've sent out the draft copy of my last assignment to learning support minutes just before the clock strikes 12. I can practically scream and shout out my happiness and relief, and jump around if it isn't night time now.

Upcoming weeks will be celebrations for my birthday. Belated, yes, but heck I was so occupied in April, my dad too. So long as everyone's happy on that day, I don't really bother. =D And exam prep for June... hope my notes can be ready before that since I've been too busy consolidating those notes. =P

Upcoming week

Upcoming week will be tedious. I'm having my wisdom tooth surgery (again) for the right side and dad's having his surgery for removal of kidney stone. Even though it's a day surgery, he'll be kept under observation overnight. Hope all will be uneventful.

愛喝酒的人

喝酒的人, 愛上的不是酒, 而是那種感覺.

喝酒是一種感情的釋放和發洩, 偶爾喝醉是一種心靈上的解壓和安慰.

有人說不會喝酒的人就是不解風情的人.

其實, 人愛上的不是酒, 而是端起酒杯, 將心事一點點的融入到酒中.

許多關於開心與不開心, 許多不能到處亂撒的野, 許多不敢當面說的話,

許多關於人之間再也不能提起的回憶, 這些片段穿越時光隧道, 浮現, 再浮現.

人喝下的不僅僅是酒, 而是一點開心, 一點傷感. 或是一點回憶, 一點心痛, 一點哀愁, 一點鬱悶.

也有一些無法對別人訴說的故事.

Time flies, again!!

It's been about 5 months since my last post, and 3 more months to 1 year when i passed my driving. Tun korkor is having his TP test on 24 Jan, hope that he passes his too!

People have been asking about my hair...my dad, Linh, Jaya, SK, Serene & others asking when am I growing my long hair back. Thinking back, i think i had it cut more than 2 years ago. My hair was long, almost touch my waist and it was gone the next minute. Everyone in Hairlistic was shocked until their jaws was almost touching the floor. 1 lady even asked me what happened to me that cause such a drastic change. The next day when I went to office, i saw pairs of eyes popping out, if they could, in reality. It was an impromptu decision, not caused by any drastic issue in my life. An impromptu decision that I've never looked back since. My answer to them is always this: when i'm sick of short hair, i'll grow my long hair back. It's my hair, duh.

Once in a while, i'll wonder to myself: what have i achieved for the past 26, coming 27 years: I've got an amazing girl from an unsuccessful marriage; my 2nd most favourite job even though I had to give up my favourite job; a part-time job that i'm really happy with, considering the people whom i'm working with and the location; a roof over my head even though it's not my own flat; extra financial burden in future but my own flat; extra financial burden but a degree which i really wanted to get. I'll maybe get another part-time if time permits when my flat is ready, unwilling to sacrifice the time with my girl at all... and change 2 mods per trimester to 1 mod. She will be 7 next year, need more time with her...

Hoping that there will be increment this year and bonus, will lessen the load at least.

Day of Op

Wisdom teeth located at upper and lower left were removed under GA @ JMC earlier today and it's confirmed, according to myself at least, that I have slow recovery rate under GA procedure... =X

Anyway, I'm going to spend the coming week to work on my CU1010 last assignment, since i was given 8 days of MC~ *happy*

Even though the feeling of numbness is wearing off slowly, it is slower than I expected as i'm still feeling it but certainly it's not as bad as when I just left JMC. But the feeling of hunger really sucks. I had my last meal at 9pm yesterday and sustained till 10pm earlier with my favourite soy bean curd when the blood discharge has reduced. I wanna die!! Okay, i'm exaggerating but that's about how i felt. At least i'm still able to enjoy my favourite food despite being unable to chew on solid food and I've eaten all the food that I had wanted to eat before the surgery...Yay!! 

I have not been using coins for cash purchases for years as they go to En2's "moo-moo" coin bank by every end of the day. The coins will be deposited into her account once the coin bank gets heavy. As I was surfing internet randomly, I came across a site on how to save money in 3 simple ways and one of them is to put aside smaller notes such as $2 and $5 which means to use $10 or greater amount for cash purchases instead. Why did I not think of that or come across this article earlier?!?! Since now I know, I have decided to start today and had put aside smaller notes so that they will not be in my wallet. And of course, will not be using smaller notes again for cash purchases. What an idea to have another cash saving method to pay off my study loan. ^_^

Wisdom tooth!!

It sure is creating a hell for me, wisdom tooth!! My face is swollen now because of it, so bad that I had to visit JMC's dental surgeon to re-schedule LA OP lower left to GA OP upper and lower left, and at the earliest date possible.

Regardless, I will have to make full use of this MC to complete my assignment. It is a must since my schedule is packed for Aug and the assignment is due on 1st week of Sep.

*Fingers crossed*

1st 1/2 of Year 2014

Year 2014 has been great thus far with my 1st attempt in getting Class 3 driving licence, HDB flat selection and my class for psycho is starting this month. Also, not forgetting working in PB with my beloved more-than-just-colleagues people!!

Although the hole in my pocket is huge, and will still be huge for the next 6 years due to my psycho class, all the spending for the above are in for a good cause. Investments, as said.

And i think after all this, I will start my Reiki class. *happy*

YES!!!

I passes my tp test with 1st attempt, I'm so happy!!! At least, my 13 revision classes did not come to a naught. Hahaha!!

Thanks to papa and his friends for celebrating this event with me. It truly is my best birthday present for this year. It could also had become the worst present if I had failed.

Next up: we shall see what's next.. Hahaha!!

夜已深, 人已靜.

風兒吹起悲傷時, 不時想起過往事.

此時往事則不該, 不該出現在腦海.

畢竟一箭中紅心, 但也非只有一箭.

相似百箭穿心肺, 穿得再也無淚痕.

只能選擇不歸路, 雙對只能各自飛.

經過道路非一般, 不知是否行得出.

心裏傷痛千萬層, 並非短時能恢復.

面對人前裝沒事, 笑一笑掩蓋真情.

或許一生只有單, 原因並非說不清.

只是並非過來人, 不會了解傷多深.

也是希望多一次, 再次能與人成雙.

是否能踏出陰影, 如今仍然全不知.

只能對看著世間, 是否真能再相信?